5 Narcissist’s Social Media Tricks Exposed

Instagram filters and Facebook check-ins: these were invented for brunch, not psychological warfare. Yet here we are, in an era where narcissists have weaponized the humble selfie and transformed status updates into ego-boosting missiles.

If you think social media is just a place for memes and baby photos, buckle up. Narcissists are out here playing chess while the rest of us are distracted by TikTok dances.

Spotting a narcissist in the wild is challenging enough. Online, where reality is curated and the mute button is just a click away, it’s even harder.

Let’s pull back the curtain on the top five social media tricks narcissists use—so next time you’re scrolling, you’ll know when to roll your eyes and when to run.

1. The Endless Highlight Reel

Social media was made for sharing. Narcissists, though, have taken this and run with it—straight into the end zone, football spiked, arms raised, and a camera rolling in 4K.

Their feeds are highlight reels on steroids: exotic vacations, flawless selfies, name-dropping posts about “casual dinners” with minor celebrities. (If they ever post an unfiltered photo, it will be the day Instagram goes offline for good.)

The trick isn’t just about showing off. These posts are designed for maximum admiration and envy. Every like, every “OMG you look amazing!” comment is fuel for their grandiose self-image.

But here’s the kicker: beneath the surface, it’s all smoke and mirrors. The perfect couple photos? Cropped to hide the sulking partner just outside the frame.

The “impromptu” brunch? Staged after 45 minutes of lighting adjustments and a small nervous breakdown over pancakes. Narcissists crave validation, and on social media, they’ve found their own bottomless pit of it.

Feeling inadequate when scrolling past their curated feed? There’s your sign—it’s working. Remind yourself: actual life happens between the posts, usually off-camera, possibly in sweatpants.

2. The Humblebrag That Isn’t Humble

If you’ve ever seen a post that goes, “Can’t believe I got promoted again! Tried to keep it quiet but my boss insisted I announce it,” congratulations—you’ve witnessed the humblebrag in its natural habitat.

Narcissists wield this move like a chef’s knife: with precision, flair, and zero subtlety.

These posts seem self-effacing, but look closer and you’ll see the humble part is just window dressing. The real goal is applause.

Sympathy for their “struggles” (which always end in victory), a chorus of congratulatory emojis, and a storm of DMs asking how they do it all.

This trick keeps the narcissist front and center, while making it difficult for anyone to call them out. After all, who wants to rain on someone’s parade—especially when the parade is disguised as a story about “just trying my best”?

If their “bad day” involves a spa treatment or a casual mention of their third award this quarter, you’re not alone in wanting to gently toss your phone in the nearest river.

3. Playing the Victim for Sympathy Clicks

There’s nothing like a cryptic status update to get the DMs flowing: “Some people will never understand what you’ve been through. Praying for strength.”

Cue the worried friends and digital hand-holding. Narcissists love to cast themselves as the misunderstood or wounded hero, gathering sympathy like candy at Halloween.

This isn’t about vulnerability or sharing genuine struggles. It’s a calculated ploy: post just enough detail to spark curiosity and concern, but never enough for anyone to actually understand what’s going on.

When people reach out, they’re rewarded with vague responses and, eventually, praise for being so “brave.”

Why does this work? Empathetic people rush to help, and the narcissist gets exactly what they want: attention.

The bonus? If anyone dares to challenge or question them, they can double-down: “Can’t believe even you doubt me. Figures.”

Next time a friend posts a status so vague it could be about anything from a bad haircut to global catastrophe, ask yourself: are they looking for comfort, or just a crowd?

4. The Discard and Hoover Dance

Narcissists don’t just play games with their exes in real life. Social media becomes the stage for a performance worthy of an Oscar: the Discard and Hoover routine. Here’s how it plays out.

After a breakup—or even a minor tiff—the narcissist will erase all traces of you from their feed, as if you’ve been digitally Thanos-snapped. This public disappearing act sends a message: “Look how over it I am.”

But wait, there’s more. Suddenly, a streak of new connections, flirty comments, and heart-reacted stories appears. As soon as you seem to have moved on, a wild DM slides in: “Hey stranger. Just checking in. Miss our chats.”

The Hoover maneuver is in full swing, sucking you back into the drama with one emoji-laden message.

This trick plays out for the audience, too. Followers see the “thriving” updates and picture-perfect rebound. Meanwhile, private messages ping-pong between “I’ve never been better” and “Was it all my fault?”

The goal: keep you hooked, keep the followers guessing, and never, ever look internally.

Feel like you’re starring in a reality show you didn’t audition for? That’s no coincidence.

5. Triangulation with Likes and Comments

Nothing says “healthy communication” like a narcissist using social media as a chessboard for manipulation. Their favorite tactic: triangulation.

This isn’t about geometry class, although emotional whiplash is almost guaranteed.

Here’s how it goes: they post a photo with a new “friend,” tag you and someone else in a meme about loyalty, or like every photo their ex posts for a week straight.

The message is calculated: spark jealousy, create confusion, and keep all parties off-balance.

Triangulation isn’t accidental. It’s a time-honored move for narcissists: compare one person to another, stir up rivalry, and watch the chaos from the comfort of their Instagram throne.

The best part—for them—is plausible deniability. “What? It’s just a like. Don’t be so sensitive.”

If you find yourself scrolling their activity and wondering if you’re losing it, you’re not. The game is rigged to make you question your own sanity.

Remember, when it comes to narcissistic social media drama, you don’t have to play along.

Social Media Savvy and Sanity

Here lies the ultimate challenge: social media isn’t going anywhere (unless your phone dies, and let’s be honest, that’s just another excuse to stare at a wall).

Narcissists will keep finding new ways to perform, provoke, and collect validation like it’s an Olympic sport.

Spotting these tricks means you can step off their rollercoaster.

Mute liberally. Unfollow with gusto. Reclaim your feed for joy, memes, and the occasional blurry cat photo.

Most importantly, connect with real people, offline and without filters. No one needs to see your dinner from seven angles or your relationship status as a public service announcement.

Your worth isn’t measured in likes or comments—and no narcissist gets to decide otherwise.

And if you notice a sudden outbreak of “inspirational” quotes or suspiciously curated selfies?

Well, at least you’ll know exactly what you’re dealing with.