10 Narcissist’s Mind Games You’re Already Falling For

Ever feel like you’re starring in a psychological thriller, only it’s your relationship and nobody’s yelling “cut”? Welcome to the wobbly tightrope walk that is dealing with a narcissist and their never-ending circus of mind games.

Most people don’t spot these tricks until they’re knee-deep in the quicksand, wondering how their reality turned into a hall of mirrors.

If you’re tired of playing emotional dodgeball, it’s time to spot the games for what they are.

Here’s your no-nonsense guide to the top 10 narcissist mind games—complete with a dash of sarcasm, a spoonful of empathy, and actual advice you can use before dessert.

1 Silent Treatment Olympics

Narcissists love the silent treatment almost as much as they love a shiny new mirror. Suddenly, the air turns frosty, and you’re left replaying every tiny thing you said for clues.

Was it when you asked them to take out the bins? Or when you dared to suggest “Love Actually” was a tad overrated?

This isn’t your average sulk—this is cold war with extra ice. The goal is to make you squirm, crave their approval, and apologize for crimes you didn’t commit.

Recognize it for the power play it is, and don’t beg for their attention. Take a deep breath, focus on your own plans, and remember: you’re allowed to enjoy a peaceful evening, even if they’re practicing to join a monastery.

2 Gaslight Central Station

Feeling like you’re losing your grip on reality? Gaslighting is the narcissist’s signature move. One minute, you’re sure they made that snarky remark about your cooking.

The next, you’re doubting your senses because apparently, “that never happened,” and “you’re just too sensitive.”

Gaslighting makes you second-guess your own memory, instincts, and sanity.

Whenever the truth feels slippery, jot things down. Keep a record—even if it’s just on your phone or a good old-fashioned notebook. Hard evidence doesn’t gaslight you back.

3 The Constant Critique Carousel

Nothing says “affection” like unsolicited feedback on your outfit, job, or how you parent the dog. Narcissists nitpick to keep you off balance. One day it’s your laugh, the next it’s your friends.

The running commentary is designed to shrink you down until you’re so grateful for their approval, you’d accept a “nice shoes” as a marriage proposal.

Notice the pattern. Instead of defending every little thing, try responding with a disinterested “Noted” and get on with your day. Their opinions aren’t law—don’t give them the power to decide your self-worth.

4 The Martyr Makeover

Ah, the self-sacrificing hero who’s always giving, giving, giving—then reminds you about it. Repeatedly.

“After everything I’ve done for you…” becomes their battle cry, usually when they want you to feel guilty for setting a boundary or asking for basic decency.

Spot the guilt-tripping for what it is: manipulation with a halo. Everyone’s allowed to have needs and limits. You’re not a villain for expecting reciprocity or a little peace and quiet.

5 The Blame Hot Potato

There’s never a spud too hot for a narcissist to toss your way. No matter what goes wrong—the car battery’s dead, the coffee’s cold, the sun didn’t shine—they’ll find a way to make it your fault. Apparently, you control the weather now.

Stop catching the hot potato. When the blame cannon fires, calmly stick to the facts. “Sorry the car didn’t start, but I wasn’t the last to drive it.” Let responsibility land where it belongs. You’re not a one-person apology factory.

6 Love Bombing Fireworks

Remember the early days when you were the sun, moon, and every star in their sky? The constant texts, the grand gestures, the “I’ve never felt this way before”?

Welcome to love bombing, where affection is dished out in industrial portions—until you’re hooked.

This shower of adoration isn’t as sweet as it seems. The moment you get comfortable, the fireworks stop, and you’re left chasing the high.

Notice if affection only comes when they want something, or if the charm disappears the second you’re not compliant. Real love is steady, not a rollercoaster.

7 The Moving Goalpost Marathon

Nothing you do is ever quite enough, is it? You ace one “test,” and suddenly there’s a new one. Finish the washing up, and now you’re in trouble for not reorganizing the spice rack alphabetically. Every victory is followed by a fresh hurdle.

This is about keeping you off-balance and forever hustling for approval. Pause before sprinting to meet their new demands. Ask yourself: whose standards am I living by, and are they even reasonable? Your life, your rules—not theirs.

8 Triangulation Tango

Narcissists love bringing in backup dancers, whether it’s an ex, a friend, or their overly involved mum. “Well, Sarah never had a problem with my sarcasm,” or, “Even my boss says I’m great at communication.”

Suddenly, it’s you versus the world, and you’re supposed to feel jealous or inadequate.

Spot triangulation when you hear it. There’s no need to compete with imaginary rivals. If every conversation feels like a group project you didn’t sign up for, redirect it. “That’s between you and Sarah, not me.” One less dance partner on the floor.

9 The Victimhood Parade

When narcissists are called out, expect a full costume change.

The villain from scene one becomes the misunderstood victim in scene two, complete with heart-wrenching monologues about how hard their life is, or how nobody appreciates them.

Empathy is a wonderful human trait, but don’t let it be weaponized against you. Feeling for someone doesn’t mean ignoring your own needs.

If every discussion ends with you consoling them, it’s time to set firmer boundaries. Compassion doesn’t mean self-abandonment.

10 The Future-Faking Fantasy

Dreamed up plans for trips, houses, or joint Netflix accounts, only to see them evaporate faster than a British summer? Future-faking is when narcissists paint a glittering vision—just long enough to keep you around.

But when it’s time to deliver, there’s always an excuse.

Enjoy the fantasy, but don’t rearrange your whole life based on empty promises. Wait for action, not just words. Your time (and your suitcase) are too precious to be packed for a trip that never gets booked.

Stepping Out of the Funhouse

Spotting these mind games isn’t about picking fights or winning arguments. It’s about clarity, boundaries, and reclaiming your sanity—one eye roll at a time.

If you recognize even a handful of these tricks, it’s not because you’re gullible.

It’s because narcissists are Olympic-level manipulators, and you probably just wanted a loving, respectful partnership—not a season pass to Gaslight Central.

The good news? Every time you spot a game, that’s one less time you’ll fall for it. Keep your sense of humour close, your boundaries closer, and remember: you get to choose which games you play—and with whom.

Turns out, the only person who should be playing mind games in your home is the person trying to solve Wordle. Everyone else can take their circus elsewhere.