Jealousy and narcissists go together like peanut butter and pickles: a truly disturbing combo, and yet somehow, you keep finding them in the same sandwich.

If you’re starting to suspect that the charm machine in your life might be turning a radioactive shade of green, you’re in the right place.

Let’s take a look at the telltale signs a narcissist is jealous of you—and, yes, why it’s as much fun for them as a root canal.

1. The Sudden Criticism Avalanche

One minute, you’re enjoying your latest win—maybe a promotion, new relationship, or you just nailed parallel parking on the first try. The next, the narcissist in your life is serving up critiques like Gordon Ramsay on a caffeine bender.

Your success is suddenly “not that impressive,” your new partner “seems a bit boring,” and that parking job? “Don’t get cocky, the curb’s forgiving today.”

Narcissists have a sixth sense for any moment you might dare to feel proud of yourself. Their automatic response: knock you down a peg.

If your achievements seem to draw out their inner judge, it’s not because they care about your personal growth. It’s their own insecurity doing the talking.

2. The “Support” That Feels Like Sabotage

Every so often, you might be lucky enough to get a little help from your narcissist. Or, at least, that’s what it looks like on the surface.

Dig a little deeper and that “support” starts to feel a lot less like encouragement and a lot more like being handed a map that leads straight into a swamp.

Maybe your new job offers a big opportunity, and suddenly the narcissist is full of “tips” about how stressful it’ll be. Or, you start a side project and they conveniently forget to pass along the message that would’ve made your life easier.

Their version of backup is more “friendly fire” than actual support.

If your supposed cheerleader seems to be setting you up for a fall, it’s a classic sign of jealousy. Watching you struggle makes them feel better about themselves—because nothing says “I love you” like rooting for your downfall.

3. The Mysterious Disappearing Act During Your Triumphs

You announce good news: a new house, a new degree, a new high score in Candy Crush. Suddenly—poof! The narcissist is MIA. Not a congratulatory text, not even a passive-aggressive emoji.

It’s as if your happiness has triggered some kind of emergency vacation.

A narcissist’s absence during your happy moments isn’t just coincidence. They find it hard—impossible, even—to celebrate anything that doesn’t put them at the center.

If they’re not the sun, why should the planets bother spinning? Their withdrawal is a neon billboard flashing “I can’t stand your joy.”

4. The One-Upmanship Olympics

Some people just can’t let you have your moment. With a narcissist, it’s not just a bad habit—it’s their entire modus operandi.

Tell them about your new job, and they’re suddenly reminiscing about the time they were offered three better jobs in a single afternoon.

Mention your romantic partner’s sweet gesture, and they’ll describe the time they were serenaded beneath a double rainbow.

Jealous narcissists are allergic to playing second fiddle. The moment you shine, they’ll wriggle and squirm to grab the spotlight right back—even if it means inventing a story worthy of a soap opera.

It’s not a friendly rivalry, but a desperate need to prove they’re always just a bit better, luckier, or more adored.

5. The Backhanded Compliment Parade

Jealousy turns some people into poets. Unfortunately, narcissists specialize in the dark art of the backhanded compliment.

“Wow, you got that promotion? Didn’t know they were hiring anyone these days.” “You actually look nice—did you do something different with your face?”

On the surface, it’s almost praise. Dig an inch deeper and it’s a masterclass in subtle put-downs, crafted to make you question whether you’ve really accomplished anything at all.

This isn’t wit—it’s a way to salve their own bruised ego while keeping you on the back foot.

If your victories always seem to come with a side of skepticism or snark, you’re probably on the receiving end of some top-shelf narcissistic jealousy.

6. The Gossip Boomerang

Word on the street (or at least, in the group chat) is that you’re not quite as amazing as you thought. Sometimes, a narcissist’s jealousy doesn’t show up directly.

Instead, they’ll recruit mutual friends, colleagues, even the neighbor’s cat, quietly planting seeds of doubt about your achievements.

Ever notice your social circle getting a bit chilly after your big news? Or hear a rumor that sounds suspiciously like something you confided to the narcissist, only with a negative twist? This is classic indirect sabotage.

Narcissists love to control the narrative—if they can’t be the hero, they’ll settle for playing the villain behind the curtain.

It’s not just about knocking you off your pedestal. It’s about making sure nobody else dares to put you on one, either.

7. The Sudden “Victim” Routine

It’s your big day. You land a dream job, finally finish that marathon, or your TikTok video goes viral—congrats!

Right on cue, the narcissist launches into a tale of woe that somehow out-tragedies your triumph. “I’m so glad you got that raise—meanwhile, I’m dealing with the world’s worst boss/cat/flu.”

This isn’t just garden-variety self-centeredness. A jealous narcissist will twist any situation to remind you that, no matter what’s going right for you, their suffering is the main event.

Sure, you accomplished something—but can you really celebrate while they’re bravely soldiering on against adversity (that may or may not be exaggerated, invented, or conveniently timed)?

It’s an emotional bait-and-switch: every time you try to enjoy a win, they drag you into their personal soap opera.

How to Handle Narcissistic Jealousy Without Losing Your Mind

Spotting the signs is one thing—dealing with them is another. Narcissistic jealousy isn’t just annoying; it can be downright exhausting, especially when it comes from someone you care about.

Since “moving to a deserted island” isn’t always on the table, try a few of these sanity-saving tactics tonight.

Set boundaries that even Houdini couldn’t escape. If you notice the criticism avalanche building, cut it off. “Thanks, but I’m happy with my decision.” Simple, direct, and impossible to argue with (not that they won’t try).

Limit the details you share. If your successes become ammunition for their sabotage or gossip, keep the good news on a need-to-know basis. Not everyone deserves a front-row seat to your life story.

Protect your own reality. Backhanded compliments and triangulation can make you doubt yourself. Keep a mental highlight reel of your wins, so their words don’t eat away at your confidence.

Don’t take the bait. If every celebration turns into a competition or a tragedy, refuse to play the game. Empathize, but don’t let them hijack your joy.

Find your hype squad. Surround yourself with people who genuinely want you to succeed. Positive reinforcement isn’t just for puppies—it works for adults, too.

Know when to walk away. Some narcissists will never be able to celebrate your happiness. That’s a sad fact, but it’s not your job to shrink to fit someone else’s comfort zone.

Jealousy: The Narcissist’s Kryptonite

Few things rattle a narcissist more than seeing someone else thrive. Jealousy for them isn’t just an emotion; it’s a five-alarm fire that threatens to burn down the fantasy world where they’re always the star.

That doesn’t mean you have to play along, shrink yourself, or keep your light under a bushel (yes, I just went full grandma idiom).

Spot the signs, guard your peace, and keep celebrating your wins—even if the narcissist can’t clap for you. Life’s too short to let someone else’s green-eyed monster take the wheel.