20 Brutal Comebacks That Destroy a Narcissist’s Ego

Ever tangled with a narcissist and left the conversation feeling like your brain just ran a marathon in quicksand? Narcissists have a magical (okay, infuriating) way of twisting words, playing the victim, and serving up gaslighting with a side of smug.

But what if you had a pocketful of responses that stop them dead in their tracks—without stooping to their level?

Pour yourself a cuppa, settle in, and behold: twenty comebacks that’ll have any narcissist scrambling to find their next supply.

1. Excuse Me, Was This About Me or You Again?

Few things throw a narcissist off balance faster than poking the “spotlight” button. Redirect their marathon monologue to reality.

They’ll either clam up or launch into another tirade, both of which reveal exactly where their priorities lie.

2. I’m Not Interested in Competing With You

Narcissists love turning everything into a contest—who suffered more, who worked harder, who has the superior taste in avocado toast.

This line stops the race before it starts, with the added bonus of making them look a bit silly for running alone.

3. I’ll Let You Have the Last Word, Since You Seem to Need It

Let them bask in their imaginary victory. This comeback isn’t just a mic drop—it’s handing them the microphone and walking out of the karaoke bar.

4. That’s Your Opinion, Not a Fact

A narcissist’s opinions arrive gift-wrapped as universal truths. Unwrap that nonsense by stating the obvious: your opinion is just that.

Watch their face try to compute the difference between “I think” and “I am the authority on everything.”

5. Interesting Perspective. I Disagree.

Short, sweet, and devastatingly adult. Nothing makes a narcissist bristle like calm disagreement. It’s like showing garlic to a vampire, but for self-importance.

6. I’m Not Responsible for Your Feelings

Ah, the universal solvent for emotional blackmail. When they try to lay guilt at your feet, shrug it off and remind them their feelings are theirs to manage.

Prepare for fireworks—or silence.

7. I’m Done With This Conversation

Setting boundaries? Unforgivable! This phrase locks the door to their drama palace and throws away the key.

No explanation required.

8. Is There a Reason You’re Speaking to Me Like That?

Call out the attitude without raising your voice. The sheer audacity of asking for respect tends to short-circuit their programming—at least for a moment.

9. I’m Not Going to Argue With You

Narcissists thrive on dragging others into endless debates. Refusing to play sends a clear message: not today, devil.

10. That’s Not How I Remember It

Gaslighting is their bread and butter. Serve it back cold by calmly asserting your own version of reality. No need to get emotional—they’re counting on it.

11. Your Approval Isn’t Required

Waiting for a narcissist to clap for your choices is like asking a cat to fetch. Release yourself from their judgment. You don’t need their permission to breathe.

12. You’re Entitled to Your Opinion, and I’m Entitled to Ignore It

Once again: boundaries, with just the right sprinkle of snark. Narcissists hate being ignored almost as much as they love being adored.

13. I’m Not Your Therapist

Ever feel like you’re on the clock but forgot to bill? When the narcissist starts unloading for the hundredth time, this gentle reminder shifts responsibility right where it belongs.

14. I’m Happy With Myself, Thanks

When they start picking apart your quirks, choices, or haircuts, let them know their criticism is wasted effort. Self-acceptance is your new superpower.

15. Please Speak to Me When You’re Ready to Be Respectful

Give them notice that tantrums and cheap shots aren’t welcome in your orbit. There’s a good chance they’ll storm away—congratulations, peace and quiet achieved.

16. That Sounds Like a You Problem

Narcissists live to outsource their discomfort. Shine a light on that old trick, and watch them fumble for a response.

17. I Won’t Be Manipulated

Call the play before it hits the field. Pointing out manipulation not only thwarts their plan, it forces them to confront their own tactics (not that they’ll admit it).

18. I Trust Myself More Than You

Self-doubt is a narcissist’s favorite seasoning—they’ll sprinkle it on your every decision. Push the plate away and remind them your judgment is just fine, thank you very much.

19. We’ll Have to Agree to Disagree

Agreeing to disagree is the conversational equivalent of a velvet rope outside an exclusive club. They rarely handle rejection well, but at least you’ll be spared another round of mental gymnastics.

20. Silence

The ultimate comeback. Sometimes, the most devastating response is none at all. Narcissists feed off attention; if you don’t serve it up, there’s nothing left to snack on.

Enjoy the sound of your own thoughts for a change.

Using These Comebacks Without Losing Your Mind

Deploying these one-liners can feel intimidating when you’re up against someone who’s been perfecting their self-absorption routine since kindergarten.

Each comeback works best when delivered calmly, without anger or sarcasm (save that for your group chat). The goal isn’t to win an argument or be cruel—it’s to reclaim your peace, sanity, and shiny backbone.

Pick a few lines that fit your style and practice them in advance. When the narcissist next tries to rope you into their circus, you’ll be ready with your best “thanks but no thanks.”

If all else fails, there’s always the nuclear option: walking away—and meaning it.

Nothing bruises an ego inflated with helium quite like being ignored.

Good luck. May your boundaries be strong, your comebacks sharper than a hedgehog in a blender, and your peace of mind unshakable.